Essay for Grad School Part 1

For your reading pleasure, I am posting the essay I wrote for my grad school application to Chatham’s Food Studies program. Haven’t heard yet, but I’ll let you know!

About Me

My name is Shelly Danko+Day and I moved to Pittsburgh 21 years ago. I’ve been married to my husband Brett for over 15 years, I have a BFA from Slippery Rock University and I love gardening. I’ve been looking for work for over a year, and most of the jobs I’m seeing don’t entirely appeal to me, although I have applied for many. When I saw Chatham’s ad about the new Food Studies program, something just clicked in me. It’s a passion that I have not recognized until recently and I’m very excited about the possibilities!

I feel connected to the past, my past and the future through agriculture … planting, growing, nurturing and harvesting are all major parts of my life. It wasn’t until recently that I realized it has always been a large part of my life. Even when I didn’t notice, gardening was influencing me. From one end of the US to the other I was affected by nature in ways that shaped who I am today. It’s hard to imagine a time when I wasn’t growing something but there were many years when I was disconnected from it. Now I am fully engaged in homesteading activities. I raise chickens, have a small home garden where we grow herbs and tomatoes, and I’m a key member of Mildred’s Daughters Urban Farm working group in Stanton Heights.

First Dig

Until I was 10, my family lived in a small town in northeastern PA. I was a pretty intense kid and in addition to spending large chunks of time watching the minute hand on a clock move or staring at the sun as it slowly disappeared behind the hill, I spent countless hours playing in the un-planted areas of our garden. A favorite thing for my sister and me to do was dig for worms in the spring. We would go out with flashlights and get the juiciest night crawlers for my dad to take fishing.

One of my first memories was of picking scallions; they were the first things to come up in the spring. We also grew potatoes, carrots and garlic, and our neighbor had a big old rhubarb plant. My father made sauerkraut in a huge wooden barrel, and once he ground his own horseradish by hand.

Green Granny

Both my grandmothers had gardens, too, and were very green by today’s standards. My Grandma Morley was always doing “crazy” things like throwing coffee grounds on her plants and saving her food scraps and paper in a milk carton on the sink…even tissues! She had a makeshift rain barrel, and she saved her bath water to flush the toilet! My favorite food at Grandma’s was macaroni and tomatoes made with elbow macaroni and canned tomatoes from her garden…she made special batches without seeds just for me.

Happy as a Clam?

Are clams really happy? I mean, what do they have to be so happy about. Lobsters taste good, they should be happy, but I guess their lives are pretty stressful…I’ve seen them in the ocean and they’re pretty skiddish…backing into their hole at the bottom of the sea when we’re just lookin’ at them! Clams have that hard shell, so maybe they just appear happy. No one can see them and we think they’re all content sitting there in their shells. But I guess that’s one reason to be happy, they’re safe. There are few incidental predators that can attack them. They’re pretty secure, and they see tragedy all day with other creatures getting eaten right n front of them. Like little fish and shrimp, even sea urchins with their big spines get eaten. The clam just sits there, filtering out his food from the sea water that floats by. But then again, they aren't so happy when the sea otter comes by. Or if they’re in a tide pool and a raccoon grabs them! Who’s happy then? Not the clam!

I was just thinking, of course, that I’m happy as a clam. I’m very content with life. Not sure how I’ve made it through this year + being unemployed (oh, yea, unemployment benefits!) but I have and I’m not stressed. Today I was offered a job, just for 5 weeks, but it’s something I really love to do, so I took it. Doesn’t start until April 16^th, so I’ll still be able to get some stuff done that I wanted to before I go back to work. The list was made back in October 2008 when I first was officially with out a job. I can’t let the second winter being unemployed go by without finishing that list. And since there are only 20 days left, I better get on it! I’ll update, I promise.

Oh, as for the gap in postings, I was a resolution, and as most resolutions go, I broke it. Sue me!

Olympics and other thoughts

Watching the Olympics…wow! Love to see such feats of strength, skill and grace! I really got into the Olympics in 2002 when I had my big cut abdominal surgery. I was hopped up on percocet and unable to move much, except a mandatory walk around the block every day. It’s a great thing to watch when you can’t move…I just soared with the skiers and won every gold medal with them! It made me feel like I could accomplish anything! I tried skiing once and enjoyed myself, but I also hurt myself…not too bad, but I will never be an Olympian. Besides the fact that I am over 30 and not even close to being in shape, I don’t have the drive, dedication or motivation to be an athlete. I have drive, dedication and motivation to do other things, just not anything quite that athletic…and if I did I would still prefer to watch these guys (men and women) perform. They are amazing, and I’m a huge fan of all types of skiing, skating, sledding, jumping, luging and snowboarding. I’d like to attend in person some day.

I’m a little confused about some of the sponsors, though. When I was a kid I remember being shocked when a fellow kid, in training of some sort, had never eaten at McDonalds! Their parents didn’t let them eat any kind of junk food. Now I see that to “eat like the Olympians” you need to eat McNuggets with a special sauce. Weird. And what does Coke have to do with heart health?

I’m over-caffeinated today, thanks to the great coffee at a meeting I want to this morning. Thanks Chris! It’s a beautiful day and the decision is to go for a walk or watch a movie before the hubby goes to work at 6. Humm. We really should get outside, but I want to just watch the Olympics and take a nap! Caffeine is a weird thing!

Things that remind me of people...

I skipped a day of blogging but I had good reason. I had paperwork to do and I applied for a job, which takes longer than one would think. My writing is always time consuming, that’s why I’m doing this blog, so I can get better at writing…how’s that goin’? The job is with the Audubon Society of Western PA the title is “Native Plant Center Coordinator”. I’m perfect for that position…I hope they hire me!!

I thought of a couple topics I want to cover, but I can only remember one right now…Things that remind me of someone. For example, when I wax my legs I think of my friend, Carrie Quinn. She introduced me to leg waxing and the pain associated with it. She also taught me to exfoliate or you’ll get ingrown hairs…not pleasant! I met Carrie on the bus. I often think if it had been after the cell phone became popular or the ipod, we probably wouldn’t have met, everyone being in their own little world. But this was at a time when you read on the bus or stared out the window or watched people. On this particular morning, I was people watching. I was watching a couple people across from me talk over an open seat, and Carrie was standing, being polite. After 5 minutes or so, I suggested that the two sit together so Carrie could have a seat. OH! What a concept. That’s how I remember it. We were friends from then on. Carrie is my kick-boxing, ballerina friend who taught me about leg waxing. She was there the moment I discovered that my business was over because my partner had gone behind my back and taken over the lease. She introduced me to bad movie marathons, although that was mostly her and Brett…boy were they bad movies! She moved to California, married a guy from college that she was secretly in love with the whole time, and now has a gorgeous daughter. I’m so happy to still have Carrie in my world and now in my daily life…thanks FB!

The microwave reminds me of my friend Bill. We were friends in the 80's in Southern California, until he went to the army. I lived with his mom and brother and sister my senior year of high school when my folks moved to Pittsburgh. He came back form the army and it was a full house. He loved the microwave! He would cook hot dogs wrapped in a damp paper towel. He used the microwave for everything from drying herbs to fireworks displays (he came home from a night out and decided he wanted to see just what would happen if you put metal in the microwave!) Bill was a trip! Don’t know what the army did to him…before he left we were such good friends, but when he came back he was stuck in his own little world... in his head…sometimes trying to talk to him I felt like an interrogator, he wouldn't peep! The army prepared him for the enemy, unfortunately it seemed that's what I had become to him. I saw him once after I left California, and now I hear he’s "born again" and has something like 5 or 6 kids. Good for him! I hope he’s had a good life! (sincerely) I still think about him when I’m using my microwave!

That’s all for now…second install after I finish my essay…

Wednesday February 17th

Well, as promised I’m writing this morning, although I don’t have a list ready…thought I’d stick to the method of writing on the fly. For the first time in over 3 years of owning chickens, today I really didn’t like going out to feed them. Not that I don’t love my chicks, and not that I don’t love the winter and all this snow, but I don’t love all this snow! It wouldn’t be so bad if it was the initial 3 feet or whatever, but EVERY FREAKIN DAY there is new snow on the ground, on the feed bins, on the compost, on the lanai (the chickens lanai) and it gets on my pant legs in my boots (cause I don’t lace my boots to run out to the coop with water and food for 5 minutes) and my hands get cold and the chickens are running away from all the falling snow…it’s just so stressful for both me and the girls. Oh snow falling from the sky, I see you in slow motion today but you can’t fool me, you’re still falling and will accumulate! I’m pretty tired of it. We’ve had over 35” of snow this MONTH! And it’s only been 17 days! Average snowfall is less than 5”! I’m just pretty tired of it. Not the cold, just the constant new snow.

Whew! Breath...focus...

I felt like yesterday was a really great day. Not sure why, but after reading my post, I feel like I’m on the right path, whatever path that may be. I’m going to focus on what I’m passionate about and would love to do and have done for free for many years…grow stuff! I’m talking legal stuff…food! Even before my job at Grow Pittsburgh I had a garden in the neighborhood with local kids. I befriended them and let them participate mainly because when I told my neighbors what I was doing, everyone said, “good luck! The kids will just destroy it! You won’t get anything.” So I figured if they felt like it was theirs they wouldn’t want to destroy it. I was right, or the kids that would destroy it didn’t notice it, either way we had a nice harvest of peas and tomatoes, a great big “S” shaped cornfield and pumpkins! Yes, pumpkins, that I’m sure no one actually knew were there. But, alas, my neighbor whose yard I was using was moved to a nursing home and the house sold and was broken into apartments and the land was trashed with drywall and crap. That’s when I got a spot in a shared garden at the top of the cemetery. A valiant effort for 3 years resulted in little harvest due to the deer, groundhogs and other misc. critters that ate anything that sprouted! That was all before the farm and Grow Pittsburgh and now I’m working at Mildred’s Daughters Urban Farm, the only zoned farmland in the city of Pittsburgh. Last year we grew enough to feed 15 CSA families. It’s a great farm and working with Barb is great! She knows so much and she’s always learning, too! I’m glad to be a part of it…next best thing to owning a farm with only part of the responsibility!

So, I guess what I’m saying is for the first time in over 18 months I finally feel like I’m not trying to force something. I’m happy with where I am and confident in my new path…not exactly sure what that is but I’m almost there! One thing that makes me more confident is the fact that yesterday I was checking my bank account and discovered that the consolidation loan I took out 5 years ago is almost paid off. That’s all the debt I have from a span of 8 years of and 2 businesses. The amount in my checking account would cover the loan and leave me with $6!! Except for a parking ticket, I’m free and clear! No student loans, no credit cards, no mortgage, nothing! It’s a liberating feeling. I’m not going to clear out my account just to be done with it…it is February and the house and car may need something…but it’s really good to know that I’m almost done with that phase of my life. Now if I had just listened to Brett in the first place I wouldn’t have had credit cards and wouldn’t be in this mess, but in your 20’s you think you’ll eventually start making the big bucks and the bills will melt away. I just wasn’t that driven to sell my soul and generate that type of income…always trying to do the right thing and follow my heart…. which is how it should be.

Ten minute free flow of my day

Woke up late, thinking about how long I’ve been unemployed, it allows me to sleep in and not worry about what I’ll do with myself…I just get through the day, not that its bad I’m really enjoying myself for the most part. Sure I don’t have a place to be outside of my house but I have my house, my husband, my computer and I stay connected. I’m involved with the farm and Bioneers, an environmental group, and I have a lot of friends and contacts, and I am happy really happy. I can’t explain it. I guess many people get their self worth from a job, what they do is who they are, I’ve never had that problem when I have a job I am fully engaged, loyal, dedicated but I’ve changed direction quite a few times in my life and I’m sure I will again, so this brief, ok lengthy, hiatus has been really eye-opening! I don’t have a lot of cash but I don’t really need anything. I’ve got a warm house, I had food from the farm work I did all summer, and now I have food I put away that we are eating…tomatoes, peaches, lots of jams, celery, pesto, and assorted squash, beans, peas and still getting carrots from the farm, at least we were until 3 feet of snow blocked the doors of the greenhouse! So, I don’t need food, house is paid for, and the utilities are covered by Brett for the most part. I don’t like that sentence and I want to delete it but this exercise won’t let me…drat! I made a nice breakfast of potatoes, turkey bacon and eggs – oh yea! I have 5 chickens that give us plenty of protein! - And then took him to work at 1pm, spent a couple hours on the computer there, reading about food issues, the missing Pittsburgh mayor (he’s been found :() and checking email, then I went to the gym where I did 4 different cardio sessions and the weight circuit…first time in 3 weeks! What a slacker! While at the gym I was reading a magazine I picked up a few days ago called ODE, the cover has a woman holding a pile of dirt and the heading is “the joy of dirt” so I had to have it. Interesting mag, only read about 10 pages but lots of interesting info. That’s where I got the idea for this exercise (http://ilikezen.com/)…since I already committed to writing everyday, this is perfect! Just sit down and write every word that comes into my head…well, almost every one! So this is what I’ll do. I think I’ll start every morning, before Brett gets up, but after I’ve had some coffee!

Oh, I just remembered something I wanted to mention. Why do people suck? Ok, it’s not worth getting into, but I’m so sick of people being idiots in the snow, bullying other cars when there’s only one car width cleared, so someone has to back up all the way down the street, and trucks that can clearly get through deeper snow won’t park off the road…right in the road. And with Jamaican accents! ARGH! Ok, see why it wasn’t worth mentioning?!?!

I’ve now been at this for more than 10 minutes so I should close. I’m going to write a list of topics that I want to cover in the future, and I’ll post that tomorrow. G’night!

I am connected!!

Still learning how to navigate my new macbook keyboard...but I have (what I think is) free internet service from my house!

Now I'll be connected to everything I want in the world (well, the www.!) When I have some time I'll post more, but for now, Just a note to mark my entry into connected-ness!

Shelly